


didn't expect to see you again (but I'm glad you're not dead)

by brassmama



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Compliant, Captain America: The Winter Soldier Compliant, Christmas, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-02-27 10:09:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2688893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brassmama/pseuds/brassmama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Melinda May refuses to let Phil spend another Christmas at work and continues a tradition of kidnapping him to her mother's house.</p>
            </blockquote>





	didn't expect to see you again (but I'm glad you're not dead)

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the following feelstide prompt: Someone forces the new director of SHIELD to take Christmas off.

**December 22nd, 2014. The Playground; Location Unknown.**

The majority of SHIELD was quietly taking a few days holiday while the world wasn’t collapsing. A small skeleton crew was staying on base, to keep on the look for all things weird and dangerous, including Skye, Fitz, and Mack.

Melinda May was packing a travel bag and finalizing her travel plans before Trip flew the remaining vacationers safely (and invisibly) to an International Airport so that everyone could easily disperse to where they needed to be. It was as she walked past his office that she realized Phil wasn’t planning on flying out and thus why she was now looming over her friend as he tried to dodge out of leaving. The arguments boiled down to not having anywhere to be. She’d give him somewhere to be.

“Unless you can find a dire emergency that forces us all to stay here between now and when the Quinjet is going to take off, Phil, pack a bag; you’re coming home with me.” Melinda knew she had him. Phil had never turned down a trip ‘home’ with her, not since they were Cadets. “Mom will be there and I’ll tell her you were too busy for her.”

Phil finally looked directly at Melinda, completely ignoring whatever it was he’d been distracting himself with. It was an old line, again from their days learning to be agents. “Lian would understand. I-”

“Phil, after everything that has happened this year, you need a break to do something that’s actually normal. The carving compulsions are gone, but that doesn’t mean I stop worrying about you. I never stop.”

**Early July; Thirty-ish Years Ago. SHIELD Operations Academy; Location Unknown.**

“I worry about you, Coulson.”

Phil looked up from the firearm manual he was notating. Cadet May, who was a year ahead of Phil and a notorious prankster, had opened the door into his shared quarters. It put him a little on alert that she was really as silent as rumored.

“Anything specifically worrying you?” Maybe she was luring him into becoming her next target, which, while could be amusing (possibly even fun), Phil really didn’t have time for.

“You never go home, and you don’t really hang out with anyone outside Commander Fury’s club. Don’t you want some friends?” May closed the door to the dorm room and flopped down on an empty bunk.

“What!? I have friends.” And they might not hang out very often but he and Felix were definitely friends. John was a bit of a wildman, but Phil thought he’d count him as well.

“Yeah, and where are they?” May gestured around the room, continuing before Phil could answer. “Home, with their families. Because it’s almost the Fourth of July and this is the US. People go home and grill and blow shit up.”

“If it’s so weird that _I’m_ here, then why are _you_ here, May?” Phil was trying not to shake off the defensive tone, but if she didn’t get to her point soon, he wouldn't be able.

“I’m only still here because you _need_ to leave campus. Seriously. Have you left since you spent winter break at the hotel in town? It’s kinda sad, Phil.”

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Well, _Melinda_ , I fail to see how where I spend my breaks is any of your concern.”

“If you lose it in the middle of drill, it will be. Pack for a week; you’re coming home with me.” She got up and walked out, leaving the door open so he could hear the silence in her wake.

Phil stared after her. Clearly, this was a prank. He barely knew her. She barely knew him (though apparently not as barely, since she knew where he spent his down time). Someone had clearly marathoned some after school specials about the power of random friendship. He closed (and locked) the door and went back at his book, finding the paragraph he’d been marking up.

Ten minutes later, she was back. And she was carrying luggage. 

“You’re not packed yet? What kind of cadet are you, Coulson? I was gone for ages.”

“I thought you were trying to prank me.” 

“Later, probably. Sooner if you make me pack for you. Bring a swimsuit. Leave the manuals.”

And that was how Phil ended up spending his 21st birthday at the home of Qiaolian May, senior agent of SWORD, a terrifying woman who clearly was convinced he was trying to sleep with her daughter.

“Don’t worry, Phil. She’s like this about everyone her children bring home. Only two of them have disappeared. We thought they found a body last year, but it was too old.” Melinda passed him a beer from the fridge. “Bottoms up, birthday dude.”

“How did you even find out when my birthday is?”

She just smiled and Phil celebrated his birthday, for the first time in four years, with Melinda May.

**December 23, 2014. Home of Qiaolian May; Ellicott City, Maryland.**

Qiaolian greeted Phil at the door. “Oh, it’s Phil. So glad to see my daughter forgave you whatever had me picking her up from a Canadian roadway. Also that you are indeed not dead.”

“You look great, too, Lian.” The two hugged, maybe a bit tightly. Phil hadn't been here in years and, despite her words, both Lian and Phil knew how much she'd missed him.

“Thank you, Phil. You look terrible. Come in, have some cookies, and get some energy back.” The older woman patted Phil’s shoulder, “Merry Christmas.”

She was definitely about to say more when swearing, probably from the mouth of one of her younger grandkids, drifted out of the kitchen. “I'll be back for you; I just need to wash my grandson’s mouth out with soap.”

Phil looked back at Melinda and shared a smile. “I’m glad you kidnapped me.”

Melinda smacked Phil lightly on a shoulder. “Come on, my nieces will be excited to see you.”

* * *

More people arrived as the afternoon moved along, mostly Melinda’s siblings and their families. Phil could hardly believe that Lee and Vicki, the two eldest of Melinda’s five nephews and nieces, both of whom were in college, and Vicki had brought her girlfriend, so obviously that was serious. As promised, the nieces were all excited to see Phil and gave him a ridiculous number of hugs. The youngest, Melinda’s nephew Dave, was somberly cleaning cookie dishes, but did spare a few moments to say hi and exchange pleasantries.

Maria showed up around sunset with, much to Phil’s surprise, Clint Barton in tow.

Maria had been to a lot of Christmases at the May house hold, even before joining SHIELD. Hell, Phil was under the impression that she’d been around forever since her mother and Lian had been colleagues at SWORD. Nick had headhunted Maria during her internship at SWORD, but Lian made sure to keep in touch. _“If that ship ever sinks, I’ll make sure there’s a place for you here.”_

But as far as why Clint Barton -archer, Avenger, former SHIELD agent, current employee at Stark Industries, who Phil had heard was living on a farm- was tagging along with Maria, Phil’s best guess was that Maria had put her foot down about wherever he was spending the holiday; the man looked run down and run over. Clint’s facial hair was at least a week’s growth, maybe a little more, and the shadows under his eyes gave the impression he hadn’t been sleeping much recently.

Phil pulled back to the kitchen, unsure of what the man knew about Phil’s own resurrection and current position as Director. The last thing he wanted was to disrupt the evening with his inability to consider others in the past year. Clint would see him eventually, but Phil could be less of an ass and wait until after introductions.

Maria caught him right away. “Are you hiding in the kitchen? From Barton?”

Phil glared back and bit out. “Clearly.”

Maria walked over and Maria-handled him on to a stool at the breakfast bar.

“You stay here. I’ll grab Clint. You two can have your moment. We can over-do the eggnog during dessert.” And she left the kitchen.

Phil was considering exits still when Maria towed Clint into the kitchen. Clint didn't look much better than from minutes ago, but he'd removed the slightly old coat and hat combo to reveal that despite his facial hair, the hair on his head was cut close to it’s normal style and he was wearing a nice pair of jeans with a nice looking grey dress shirt. Clint’s steps stuttered a beat before Maria set him next to Phil at the bar and left them to their devices.

Phil swallowed.

“Hey.” God, that sounded lame.

Clint looked down, then up at Phil, before looking back down and exhaling harshly.

“I didn’t expect to see you again, even with the whole NOT dead thing.”

Clint sounded… relieved. It was better than angry or betrayed or any of the reactions Phil had been bracing for from the man. He had been left to believe Phil had died for two years.

“You look good.” Phil winced. “I mean, it’s good to see you.”

Clint attempted a smile. “Thanks.”

“How have you been?”

“You want to know how I’ve been?” Clint huffed at that, “You mean aside from all this shit that has happened in that last two years?”

Phil nodded, attempting to bleed candor, “You left SHIELD. Other than assumptions, I don't know what you've been up to and that’s why I asked. Clint, I honestly do want to know.”

“I’ve been okay. Pepper hired me as a security consultant, but mostly Stark just steals me to go test his new tech. Bought a farm, and was going to spend a perfectly healthy Christmas there before Maria showed up and refused to leave until I came and spent some time with people other than genius level IQs. And when I told her I was spending Christmas alone, she said that was worse AND that she was still technically my boss. I think she thinks I need it, but I’m honestly fine.” Clint shrugged. He knew the last wasn’t completely true, but at least he hadn’t said he was great. “How about you, bossman? How’s the return to the living going?”

“I almost lost my mind a few weeks ago because I'd been treated with an alien based healing serum, which was not fun. I’m trying to not get what’s left of SHIELD wiped off the map. Melinda’s been around. Nick-” Phil paused trying to decide if Clint would be in the know about Fury’s not-death.

“Yeah, Nick is running around rescuing pockets of agents and blowing up Nazis. I heard.”

Phil laughed at that description. “Pretty much. He saved a couple of my team back in the spring.”

“How’s Lola? Saw some photos online of her falling out of the sky.”

“Probably contemplating my murder for not taking her out.”

Then, just as the conversation was finding its stride, Phil’s phone started beeping some 8-bit pop song at him; Skye was clever when she got too bored. Clint furrowed his eyebrows until Phil pulled out the cell and glanced at the ID. “Sorry, I have to take this. It’s our skeleton crew.”

Phil stepped away, answering, “Skye? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, except you disappeared before I could wish you a Merry Christmas and I spent the last hour trying to figure out where you were hiding before pinging your phone. Also, Fitz and Mack set something on fire in the hangar, but Simmons helped put it out pretty fast, so don’t worry. How’s Maryland?”

“Fire? How…” Phil breathed out, taking a moment to remember that Skye had said not to worry. “I’m glad to hear that everything is fine. Merry Christmas Skye. We’ll be back before New Years.”

“Merry Christmas, boss.”

They both ended the call. Phil smiled to himself and turned back to see Clint had gone out to the porch, probably in the aim of giving Phil some privacy. He grabbed his coat and followed.

Clint glanced back from where he was leaning on the railing. “I hadn’t really thought about you having new people. I guess I hadn’t really thought about you in general, but I did think you were dead for two years, so I would say I get a pass. I didn’t realize until now how much I missed being on Strike Team Delta. It was good times.”

“Yeah.” Phil agreed. He, Jasper, Clint and Natasha had spent a lot of time on and off mission together during the five years or so that the team had been active. “I miss some of it too. But it’s nice to be able to not fear for our lives during Christmas.”

“Oh, yeah. Remember that Thanksgiving in Istanbul? Thought we were all gonna end up in the Mediterranean.”

“I thought Natasha was gonna stab you before we could. You just would not stop talking.” Clint had needed ten stitches on the evac flight and they’d taken fire as they’d rushed for open air space.

“Hey! It wasn’t my fault! I was on very good drugs. What about that Christmas right after Natasha joined? You and her were practically at each other’s throats half the time.” Which was true, since Phil hadn’t originally agreed with Nick’s decision to recruit the then 18 year old assassin, and he’d made his opinion known. Of course, on the same mission, she’d taken a knife meant for Jasper and that had been the end of Phil’s protests that she wasn’t in it for the long haul.

“She still has the sweater I bought her, so it wasn’t all bad.” Phil paused before verbalized the next memory that had leapt to mind, “And really the worst thing about New Years in Nepal had been the cold.”

 

**New Years; 5 years ago. Somewhere in Nepal.**

The two of them were jointly complaining to Natasha about how cold it was in the safe house and that the snow was delaying their evac and that they couldn’t leave since they were on lockdown. She smiled at their complaints and joked that if it was that bad maybe they should conserve warmth and share a bed.Then she told them goodnight and Happy New Year, leaving the video chat. After dinner, Clint revisited the suggestion.

“It’s not like I’d kick you out of bed, boss. You’re pretty.” Clint gave Phil a grin.

“As are you, Barton. Cute and pretty are definitely the foremost descriptors I’d use.” Phil thought over risking an awkward morning for warmer toes. “I guess as long as you’re fine with it, I’m happy to comply.”

“Great. I’m cute, pretty, and smart.” Clint had a genius level IQ, smart was always a given.

They shifted the pillows and blankets onto one bed and were getting stowed away when Clint’s phone  buzzed.

“Update on evac?” Phil pulled his half of the blankets up.

“No, I just set an alarm for midnight. Happy New Year, boss.” He leaned over and kissed Phil.

It was a chaste kiss, just lips to lips, and was over quickly.

Phil was silent a beat afterward before telling Clint, “I don’t want to make this awkward,” and he hadn’t expected anything to be awkward, at least not before they’d even fallen asleep and potentially gotten themselves into a compromising position, “But I don’t feel comfortable having a romantic relationship with you. Dating co-workers, in my experience, has always ended badly. The kiss was nice, and if we weren’t team mates, I’d be interested. I just want to be sure I’m not leading you on. As things are, I think it would be a bad idea.”

Clint looked, obviously, a little disappointed, “I understand. I mean, I won’t let this change anything.”

“Neither will I. We can still share the bed, of course. It was a good idea and I’d rather not loose any toes.”

Clint nodded and got in next to Phil, turning his back to him. “Goodnight, boss.”

Phil rolled away as well and replied, “Night.” It didn’t take to long to sleep.

When he woke up, Phil was the warmest he’d been the whole mission.

 

**Present.**

“You said you wouldn’t date your co-workers.”

Phil reached out his hand and gripped Clint’s, “But, we’re not co-workers anymore, are we?”

Clint smiled. “If you’re sure you want to try this with someone who still has nightmares about being puppeteered by a Norse trickster, then yeah.”

Phil nodded. “As long as you want to try.”

Clint pulled Phil into a hug, “I’m glad you’re not dead. I spent a long time blaming myself for that and a ton of other shit that I know isn’t my fault and I am so glad you’re not dead.”

Phil hugged back. “It’s freezing out here, let’s go inside.”

Maria, who was clearly a spying spier who spies, was holding mistletoe over the door when they came back in.

“Merry Christmas, you idiots.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this fic, I hope it was enjoyed.
> 
> Thank you a ton to my twin, Azek, who SPaG checked this for me. And dizmo for being a great sounding wall when I was trying to figure out what to write about. Also all my followers on tumblr and twitter who were nice and supportive when I took to my blog to complain about these two idiot characters.
> 
> Also NO THANKS to my brain for the near constant attempts to side track this fic into being about Maria Hill and Mama May. That is a fic I will attempt at a later time.
> 
> The name Qiaolian that I gave to May's mother is the sketchily sourced middle name of Melinda May.


End file.
